BIG THOUGHTS and small ones

Adults and kids alike get mired in day to day life, focusing on what is right in front of us, in the now, tomorrow, next week, next year, and then everything past that is a future that lives in a fantasy.

When young people grow, part of that process is figuring out who they are. Who they are, their core being, never really changes, even when they grow to be more mature and understand the world better. When kids adopt gender identities, it's like trying on ideas to see if they work. It's a way of looking deeply into the mirror for way too long.

It's like Narcissus, staring into the mirror, focused solely on self, at the expense of all other things, including life and how to live it. It's normal for kids to peer into that mirror and try to figure themselves out. The brain and body are flooded with hormones, filling the mind and body with growth and change. To stop this process is to stare into the pool forever, forever looking at oneself and never growing or changing.

The very nature of humans is to grow, mature, and shift away from self. Gender identity is the total focus on self. The shift from childhood to adulthood is not easy. It's painful, physically and mentally. It's scary to not know, to wish you could be young forever, to know you won't, to want to be older and not want to do any of the things that older brings.

It is the job of adults to help children grow and mature into their best and healthiest selves they can be. We cannot choose a path and put a child onto it. We can, however, pick paths to walk down together and share what we see and know, things to look out for and help navigate. This is the job of all adults who help raise children. We raise them, quite literally, that is our job, to lift them up, to increase their strength and knowledge, to level them up to adulthood.

Bring big ideas into your life with your kids. Think big thoughts. Feel big things. Pull your child away from the pool, head down a different path to navigate because drowning isn't an option.

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