Welcome to my life. It's a whirlwind of kids, chaos, pets, people, family, art, and being home (most of the time; I like to get out here and there). We unschool, so the unexpected is, well, expected...
Monday, July 30, 2007
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Posted by Jenny Cyphers at 4:20 PM
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Yesterday we went to the mall, actually two malls. We don't go very often, just sometimes. We happen to live down the street from a large mall. However, we had to go to a mall across town, because I needed to exchange something from a store that was in that one and not in the one next to us.
I got to spend all of ten minutes in the store I needed to go to, and I'll have to go back because I didn't get to do what I needed to do. We spent much of the time in stores that Chamille likes. Yes, yes, you know, Hot Topic, and similar stores.
So after our mall experience yesterday, I've decided that I'm not taking the girls to the mall again together. Margaux hated being in Hot Topic and Chamille hated being in Build a Bear, let's not even mention the Disney store! Their needs are so opposed to one another that there is no middle ground here!
I love doing Margaux things at the mall and I love doing Chamille things at the mall, but for some reason, at this time in their lives they can't find a way to love doing that for each other. It's a lose/lose situation and I really try to avoid those. I like the win/win ones.
In the car, on the way home, I told the girls that from now on I will take one or the other, but not both of them to the mall, unless we absolutely need to stop and will only be there for about an half an hour at the most. Surprisingly they both loved this idea! Margaux starts talking about how cool it would be for her to stay at home with dad while Chamille and I go, or that Chamille could get to hang out with dad while mom and her got to go. Both girls were in complete agreement on this decision! See, they can agree on some things sometimes! Win/Win! Did I say how much I love win/win situations!
So, going to the mall might actaully be fun again, and I don't have to play mediator about every decision we make while there. I know they are just in very different places with their needs and wants and likes and trying to force them to deal with each other's needs and wants and likes isn't necessarily the best solution. A little empathy and negotion would help, but it just isn't happening with this particular part of life. They can do it on other things, just not this one yet. Maybe next year, or six months down the road, we'll see.
Since they are both good kids and Chamille is very caring and generous, and Margaux is getting better at that with each day that she gets older, I know it's not forever. We spend so much time together, the girls and I, that eventually it was bound to happen that we would run across something that they don't like doing together. Honestly I feel pretty lucky that this is a first!
Posted by Jenny Cyphers at 2:23 PM